17. We bet attractive individuals think the globe will be a lot more courteous than it truly is. – shicky536

18. Whenever an expecting girl swims, she actually is a submarine that is human. – heavywafflezombie

19. Mars…is populated completely by robots! – aaqucnaona

20. We wonder if you will find any right times regarding the clock that i’ve never ever seen. – h1ghdeaz

21. Newborns are always crying because any disquiet generally is one of many worst things they usually have ever skilled. – TheHowardEffect

22. Pornography could be the only occupation where amateur services and products could be in greater need than expert people. – Unidan

23. If you’re not any longer included in your parent’s health insurance, your manufacturer’s guarantee is finished. – hexagonz

24. If two different people on opposing edges of this globe each fall a bit of bread, our planet quickly becomes a sandwich. – nklotz

25. Seeing that exactly how both Batman and Ironman’s just powers that are real super that they’ve been super rich and extremely smart, Bill Gates and Steve work certain turned off to be disappointments. – ImmaculateJones

26. Whenever Sweden is playing Denmark, it is music chat SWE-DEN. The staying letters, maybe not utilized, is DEN-MARK. – vestergaard92

27. If Hillary Clinton wins in 2016, it’s going to be the time that is first two presidents have experienced sex with each other. – AlibiBreakfast

28. Asking somebody “where are you” is a thing that is recent. If we knew where they were before we had mobile phones, the only way we could talk to people is. – saint1997

29. You could weekly update google maps street view if you would mount garbage trucks with camera’s. – impreson

30. For some of history, automobiles had collision that is automatic and might also simply take you house whenever you were sleeping or drunk. Then we got rid of this horse. – arbaminim

31. There ought to be an optional “people are resting” key in the microwave oven therefore stop from most of the additional beeping that is loud. – Idontfeellikedancing

32. Utilizing your old laptop computer to research buying a new a person is like asking it to dig a unique grave. – WorthierCaptor

33. Many teens pull their phones from their pouches to check on enough time. Our company is reverting towards the period of pocket watches. – SirTickleTots

34. In the event that you see a novelty helmet during the zoo, you are looking for the US expression of freedom in captivity. – keytarin

35. Whenever you state the term “crisp”, it moves through the straight back of the lips into the front side while you state it. – ReddyAmyFire

36. A pizza will show up at my front door if i touch my phone in the right places. – drunk_bird

37. As time passes, the insult “two dollar whore” is now progressively more unpleasant. – apocalypsemeow111

38. Rap songs that guide dollar values won’t adjust for inflation together with recommendations will seem cheaper as time passes. – sagrr

39. There isn’t any right time i have ever thought, ‘Oh awesome, iTunes started itself.’ – loveCards

40. We shall never ever learn about the certainly perfect criminal activity. – Cleffer

41. 1/3 of marriages are now from online dating sites and that number is just increasing. Which means that computer systems (algorithms) are just starting to breed people. – fleetw16

42. Killing a spider helps make the spider pool that is genetic and more life-threatening. – godspeedmetal

43. The air that comes out is from China whenever we pop bubble place manufactured in Asia. – Shadows4

44. If the North Korean residents finally have freedom of information and internet they’re likely to understand the world that is whole making enjoyable of these nation. – DanTheManVan

45. Let’s say the lottery is an organization to catch Time people? – imverykind

46. Lobsters are mermaids to scorpions. – rrtaylor

47. If work adverts state “must be proficient in Mandarin” why don’t they post the complete advertisement in Mandarin, in that way just truly proficient individuals could use? – Scamwau

48. As soon as a PhD is had by you, every conference pay a visit to becomes a doctor’s appointment. – Sland

49. Some rappers fundamentally have actually us spend them to share with us exactly what extravagant/lavish things they then do with your money. – dafunkmasta

50. They ought to make a Shazam for bird phone calls where it identifies the types of bird making the phone call. – khklann